Posts tagged improving your relationships
#shrinkthinks - How To Use FAST To Gain Self Respect In Relationships

FAST is a wonderful mnemonic device to help you gain enhanced self-respect and increased self-esteem as you negotiate easy and even the more challenging interpersonal situations that you may encounter in your daily life. It's borrowed from the truly awesome DBT treatment and here's how it goes...

  1. Fair - Be fair when you negotiate. Make sure that you accurately interpret situations. When working with others, one goal may be to come to solutions that are ethical and benefit everyone involved.
  2. Apologies - No, do not apologize for disagreeing because doing that contradicts your values. You have a right to your opinion and viewpoint. This is about being true to yourself because you gotta learn to love you.
  3. Stick - Stick to your values. Boldly. Not sure what your values are? Work with a therapist, coach, trusted friend or parent to help you get clear about where you stand on things. Never soften on your values to make others happy or to gain their favor. This erodes your sense of self.
  4. Truthful - Be truthful when you communicate. Authenticity and honesty helps you feel better about yourself, which leads to a happier and more authentic life. Again, this is hard if you're a people pleaser, but people will respect you more, and you'll love yourself for it. 

Stay tuned for more #shrinkthinks and DBT self-help.

Read More

NYC + Santa Fe Psychotherapist, Kim Seelbrede, MSW, LCSW is a Licensed Psychotherapist, EMDR Therapist, Relationship Expert + Stress/Anxiety Coach who provides Psychological Consultations in-person and online psychotherapy working with individuals and couples. Specialties include: trauma, addictions, anxiety, depression, relationships, creative, VIP + high-profile clients. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, travel and pie. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal website www.kimseelbrede.com or blog.

Smart Couples Do

Couples who create successful and satisfying relationships often have a formula for success. These dynamic couples have important skills and make thoughtful, conscious choices that lead to more closeness and connection. They do and also avoid doing certain things that contribute to creating a robust relationship. John and Julie Gottman of the Gottman Institute, known for their extensive relationship research, would call these smart couples "masters" of relationships. If you desire a dynamic and loving relationship, you may want to consider some important relationship tips that you may or may not have learned along the way. If you adore your partner and value your partnership then noticing the elements that follow may be just what you need for enhanced communication, a deeper connection and more romance.

Let's begin with what NOT to do:

Read More

NYC + Santa Fe Psychotherapist, Kim Seelbrede, MSW, LCSW is a Licensed Psychotherapist, EMDR Therapist, Relationship Expert + Stress/Anxiety Coach who provides Psychological Consultations in-person and online psychotherapy working with individuals and couples. Specialties include: trauma, addictions, anxiety, depression, relationships, creative, VIP + high-profile clients. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, travel and pie. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal website www.kimseelbrede.com or blog.