Posts tagged narcissistic personality disorder
Difficult People :: Saving Yourself From Crazy Makers And Gaslighting

Have you reached the end of your rope with the crazy makers in your life? I have them in my life as well, and even with psychological training, they frequently throw me off-course. You’ll never change them because that’s the very nature of crazy (so put your energy elsewhere!), you can however protect yourself. You are surrounded by them and you can't escape the insanity. They are your ex, colleagues, friends, lovers or family members--sometimes you even have to co-parent with them.

Perhaps your life demands regular contact with them, leaving you with feelings of dread and terror—you may also have somatic complaints or physical symptoms especially if you had a parent with similar behaviors and you are now re-experiencing the trauma! Crazy makers drain your energy and consistently engage in controlling, destructive, manipulative and reckless behaviors. Sadly, similar to a train off the tracks, they leave a path of destruction. Children are especially vulnerable to becoming collateral damage when a parent is a narcissist and/or psychopath.

What are some of these behaviors?

  • They set traps for you—it can be a no-win game

  • They are masters of distortion and manipulation

  • They create drama, drama and more drama

  • The exhibit excessive negativity

  • They display outbursts of rage and anger

  • They are frequently competitive and aggressive

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Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW is a New York licensed Psychotherapist and Consultant with extensive training and experience. She provides pscyhological consultation, therapy and coaching to a range of clients including high-profile clients, working in-person, online and worldwide. As an EMDR therapist, couples therapist + women's emotional health expert, her specialties include: anxiety, depression, trauma resolution, addictions, relationship, intimacy and sexual concerns, health + autoimmune issues, loss + grief, creative, VIP + high-profile clients. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, travel and really good key lime pie. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal website www.kimseelbrede.com or blog.

Are You Involved With A Narcissist Or An Emotional Grown-Up?

Do you think or know that you have a narcissist in your life? If so, you are likely to have your share of questions about how to identify, manage, escape from, and avoid future entanglements with narcissistic people. As a psychotherapist, I work with couples and individuals who present with many symptoms of narcissistic abuse or describe patterns of emotional abuse in their primary relationships. It's heartbreaking to come to the realization that years, and even decades, have been spent under the rule of a tyrannical parent or partner. Parents, bosses and partners with narcissistic personality disorder or strong traits have the potential to powerfully and negatively impact your physical and emotional health and wellbeing. You may be traumatized, numb and shut-down from past experiences with family members. You may also find yourself repeating this pattern in your current relationships by seeking out narcissistic partners. And so the neurotic dance of

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Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW is a New York licensed Psychotherapist and Consultant with extensive training and experience. She provides pscyhological consultation, therapy and coaching to a range of clients including high-profile clients, working in-person, online and worldwide. As an EMDR therapist, couples therapist + women's emotional health expert, her specialties include: anxiety, depression, trauma resolution, addictions, relationship, intimacy and sexual concerns, health + autoimmune issues, loss + grief, creative, VIP + high-profile clients. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, travel and really good key lime pie. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal website www.kimseelbrede.com or blog.

Divorcing A Narcissist: How To Protect Yourself From Narcissistic Abuse

In my Manhattan psychotherapy practice working with individuals and couples, many come to the realization that they are involved with or married to a narcissist. As the veil lifts, and they begin to see things more clearly, the clean-up begins. Many of these individuals seem to have charmed lives; idyllic from the outside, but once inside, it looks quite different. What's important to understand is that we are drawn to another for many, often over-determined reasons. The relationship is somehow familiar terrain for us. It's what we know best. Often, it's rooted in an early family dynamic that gets played out again and again. Here is a case example:

A young married woman suspected fairly early into her marriage that her husband was having an affair. There were the usual clumsy clues: the bad-smelling perfume, the hungry-looking marketing girl who anticipated his every need, and the new office rule: no wives at the office holiday party. When confronted, the husband consistently denied his wife's suspicions. The woman knew on some level that she had begun to disappoint her husband. After all, she was a few pounds more than her pre-pregnancy weight and had begun to lose her sparkle. A thin wife was more important than just about anything to him. Narcissists tend to idealize then devalue as a pattern, so it was a fait accompli that the fall would be hard. However, even though she was no longer 25, she was still a beautiful, accomplished and smart woman which made her particularly vulnerable to attracting narcissistic men. The young woman was pregnant when she learned of her husband's affair with his in-house marketing girl.  At work events, the other woman was unable to hide that she was the dirty little secret in their now triangulated life. Perhaps she enjoyed or needed this role -- by wooing this man from his beautiful wife and family, she was mastering early trauma or unmet needs. She felt loved and chosen. Special. it's hard to know for sure, but she was a female "mate poacher," as they say. As is often the case, the betrayed spouse is not the only damaged party; the collateral fallout can be tragic. Children's lives can be destroyed.  
While the pregnant wife spent her weekends in the park with her son (and in partial denial!), her husband stepped-up his golf game. Apparently, 
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Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW is a New York licensed Psychotherapist and Consultant with extensive training and experience. She provides pscyhological consultation, therapy and coaching to a range of clients including high-profile clients, working in-person, online and worldwide. As an EMDR therapist, couples therapist + women's emotional health expert, her specialties include: anxiety, depression, trauma resolution, addictions, relationship, intimacy and sexual concerns, health + autoimmune issues, loss + grief, creative, VIP + high-profile clients. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, travel and really good key lime pie. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal website www.kimseelbrede.com or blog.