Many couples begin marital therapy or relationship counseling because of sexual desire problems. In fact, most couples experience desire problems, as well as performance difficulties at some point in their relationships. Many who experience sexual problems may actually have performance and anxiety-related difficulties. Other desire-sapping problems include hormonal deficiencies (low testosterone, estrogen), medication side effects (antidepressants, antihypertensives), unresolved anger and contempt and any health issues or physical problems related to aging. These are real problems that zap libido and interfere with intimacy. A visit to your primary care physician or connecting with a relationship expert or couples therapist can help you sift through the biological, psychological and/or other dynamics and problems in the relationship. Before you try the sexy stuff that follows, it's important to figure out if either of you have wounds (past or present) and "un-repaired" issues that have created the couples chasm that you currently feel.Read More
Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW is a New York City Psychotherapist + Consultant who splits her time between Manhattan and Santa Fe, providing online therapy to individuals and couples. With extensive training and experience, she provides psychological consultation, psychotherapy, EMDR therapy and executive coaching to a range of clients including VIP's + high-profile clients. As a women's emotional health + relationship expert, her specialties include: anxiety, depression, trauma resolution, addictions, relationship, intimacy and sexual concerns, health + autoimmune issues, loss + grief and women's mentoring. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, meditation, travel and really good key lime pie. She lives with her husband, psychologist, scholar and mindfulness expert John Chambers Christopher. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal websites KimSeelbrede.com, Santa Fe Integrative Psychotherapy or Well+Being Blog.