Posts in Connections
Your Erotic Life :: Do You Need Sex therapy?

Tell me more about your erotic life. I think it's important. As a sex-positive therapist, I am open to conventional partnerships as well as alternative lifestyles, identities, and gender expressions. It's all just normal expressions of love

  • Are you craving more exploration, surprise, mystery, novelty, excitement, desire and passion?

  • Does your partner feel like a child or parent, thus decreasing desire?

  • Do you struggle with sharing sexual concerns with your partner, especially your sexual desires and needs?

  • Are you struggling alone with personal sexual issues?

  • Do you worry about the frequency or lack of sexual frequency in your relationship?

  • Do you feel turned-off when your partner wants sex? 

  • Does your partner struggle with sexual dysfunction?

  • Do you feel sexually unfulfilled?

  • Are you struggling to heal from a boundary violation, sexual or emotional infidelity?

  • Is your relationship longterm, and you're feeling more like roommates than lovers?

  • Are you a new parent and having trouble with life/balance or feeling romantic and sexual again?

  • Are you having hormonal or drug-related side effects or chronic pain and medical concerns?    

For many reasons, sexuality changes throughout our lifetime--this is normal. It's important however to be able to openly discuss

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Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW is a New York licensed Psychotherapist and Consultant with extensive training and experience. She provides pscyhological consultation, therapy and coaching to a range of clients including high-profile clients, working in-person, online and worldwide. As an EMDR therapist, couples therapist + women's emotional health expert, her specialties include: anxiety, depression, trauma resolution, addictions, relationship, intimacy and sexual concerns, health + autoimmune issues, loss + grief, creative, VIP + high-profile clients. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, travel and really good key lime pie. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal website www.kimseelbrede.com or blog.

Holiday Chaos Survival Tips For Couples :: Because Murder Is Not An Option

As a therapist who enjoys providing marriage and couples therapy, I've made the observation that partners struggle to work as a team during the busy, stress-filled and conflict-ridden holiday season. Feeling torn with competing interests such as family needs, travel and extra demands on time and energy can bring many to exasperation and exhaustion. If you tend to suffer because of your "people pleasing" nature and an inability to say NO, protecting your boundaries or creating healthy boundaries for yourself (perhaps you're new at this?) can be a real challenge.

Don't suffer in silence, or loudness. Many couples and partners enter marriage and family counseling after the holiday season because they feel disconnected, hurt and misunderstood, in addition to a range of other experiences, including losing once-enjoyed intimacy. Being in the company of family and friends can trigger feelings of resentment, reignite old wounds as well as highlight family of origin issues--leaving even high-functioning couples feeling de-skilled and in need of help to sort through the chaos.  

So, how do you reconnect after fighting, communication problems and hurt feelings? Having some simple tools at your ready can help you avoid the downward spiral. What follows are

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Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW is a New York licensed Psychotherapist and Consultant with extensive training and experience. She provides pscyhological consultation, therapy and coaching to a range of clients including high-profile clients, working in-person, online and worldwide. As an EMDR therapist, couples therapist + women's emotional health expert, her specialties include: anxiety, depression, trauma resolution, addictions, relationship, intimacy and sexual concerns, health + autoimmune issues, loss + grief, creative, VIP + high-profile clients. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, travel and really good key lime pie. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal website www.kimseelbrede.com or blog.

Dream Guy :: Is He Enough for you?

“He’s THAT guy you dream about,” she writes. I think, yes, seems too good to be true, and will he make you happy? A young bride-to-be recently sent me an email asking if the uber-successful and driven guy can also be "good" at relationships. Good question. It's June, and that means that bells are ringing many towards wedded bliss, but many new brides have been quietly coming to therapy or bringing their special guy in for pre-marital sessions. Hoping I can steer him towards becoming the guy who will be her everything—her knight, the one, her forever and everThe shower, the venue, the dress, the ceremony, the registry—it's all so exciting, and scary, I know. You are of that age, many of your friends are doing it. You tell me "it's time, I don't want to wait. I pass my friends pushing carriages in their yoga clothes and I want that too.”

I want to be happy for you, really I do! But it's painful when I see you both sitting on opposite sides of the couch, trying so hard to make it work. In our work together, we struggle to find shared values and goals, and even qualities that you like about the other, and yet that date is fast approaching. When picking a life partner, fear and desperation are the worst possible reasons to marry. Unfortunately, our society is noisy, as are parents and friends when it comes to marrying sooner rather than later. Concerns about being negatively judged and evaluated by others are but a few of the reasons that so many young women will settle for a less-than-ideal partnership. As I listen to you talk about THAT guy, and as you excitedly tick all the boxes listing his marriage-worthy attributes, something feels wrong, missing. He is perfect on paper. You also raise the concern that he’s demanding and self-centered. His career is everything. Will I be deposited in a suburb somewhere

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Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW is a New York licensed Psychotherapist and Consultant with extensive training and experience. She provides pscyhological consultation, therapy and coaching to a range of clients including high-profile clients, working in-person, online and worldwide. As an EMDR therapist, couples therapist + women's emotional health expert, her specialties include: anxiety, depression, trauma resolution, addictions, relationship, intimacy and sexual concerns, health + autoimmune issues, loss + grief, creative, VIP + high-profile clients. She enjoys writing, photography, yoga, travel and really good key lime pie. For more, subscribe to her newsletter or connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Psychology Today, EMDRIA and her personal website www.kimseelbrede.com or blog.