DBT Mind Shift: You Are Not Your Feelings
Are you someone who gives your emotions or physical sensations too much power? It's quite habitual for many to get swept up in the tide of strong feelings and emotions. Sometimes the tide rolls in without warning—fast and fierce—leaving you feeling distressed and emotionally dysregulated. The fierce and familiar nature of these emotional storms are a familiar response for you, and also confusing. Confusing because it feels like it’s happening in the here and now, and it may be to some extent, but it may also have roots in the there and then or long ago. That’s how triggers work, and that’s how one can get swept away.
Emotions can feel strong, and even overwhelm, but remember, you are NOT your emotions. To increase your self-esteem and sense of agency, notice when powerful feelings arise within you. Notice this experience and be curious about what may have triggered this in you. You can even direct your attention to your body. What do you notice? Where do you feel it? Is it okay to just notice and stay with the feeling and emotion a little longer without responding? You might typically say "I can’t do this, I'm completely overwhelmed." Try a reframe by saying "I feel completely overwhelmed." How does this simple shift help?
By understanding that "overwhelm" is a feeling, and that you can pause, tolerate, ride it out and ultimately survive, your life will improve. The tide does not need to take you down or cause destruction, you can learn the ride the wave. This technique is DBT speak for learning to “ride the wave.” Feelings are temporary states; they are transitory in nature. Feelings pass. Learn more about this important DBT distress tolerance skill surfing here. The psychological impact of this strategic shift can change your life.
About Holistic Psychotherapy & Wellness Manhattan
Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW is a New York State licensed Psychotherapist, EMDR Practitioner and Couple Therapist with a private practice in New York City, Montana and virtually. As a wellness psychotherapist and holistic consultant, she has receive advanced, extensive training in Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy, Internal Family Systems (IFS), Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing (EMDR), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Somatic Experiencing (SE), and Nutrition & Integrative Medicine For Mental Health. She is passionate about honoring the exquisite interplay of the mind-body connection. Kimberly Seelbrede specializes in anxiety & mood disorders, trauma and women’s mental health.
In addition to online therapy for anxiety, depression, trauma and relationship struggles, Holistic Psychotherapy & Wellness offers a wide variety of online services to fit the needs of busy professionals. New Yorkers often lead fast-paced and complex lives, which makes work-life balance and managing career, family and social obligations a challenge. Psychotherapy and wellness practices provides the support to help clients cultivate resources, resilience and enhanced emotional health, as well as uncover conflicts and obstacles that may interfere with having the life they desire.