Well+Being Holistic Mental Health
“Emotional Health & Wellness Tips From The Therapy Couch And Other Places”
Consider Couples Therapy Now Before Minor Concerns Become Bigger Issues, And Even Crisis.
When you are experiencing distance, tension, or difficulty in your relationships, you may experience feelings of abandonment, rejection, a lack of empathy, anger, disappointment, hopelessness, shame, and other emotions. Most New York couples enter relationship counseling in some state of despair. Often, they have struggled for years, and in a last-ditch attempt to save the relationship, they begin couples therapy. At this point, communication has eroded, distance is the norm, and sex is nearly nonexistent. Reasonably high-functioning couples often begin therapy to navigate difficult circumstances, seeking guidance from a relationship therapist or coach. Couples counseling is typically sought by two people who are in a romantic relationship and are experiencing challenges they want to address together. These individuals are committed to improving their relationship, whether that’s through resolving conflict, improving communication, rebuilding trust, or working through other issues that may be impacting their bond.
As an experienced couple and relationship therapist with a private practice in New York, I have witnessed many challenges among successful, busy New York and NYC couples. Still, often, problems are rooted in the same recurring issues. In our counseling sessions, we focus on creating a safe environment for sharing thoughts, feelings, and emotions. We work on active listening skills, identify important patterns in your relationship, express individual needs, build empathy, set goals, and develop effective conflict resolution skills. Sessions are virtual. 60, 90, or 120 minutes, and we can meet online wherever in the world you happen to be.
Relationship Repair After Infidelity & Intimate Betrayal
Betrayal trauma in an intimate relationship is unlike any other form of betrayal. It shatters your heart and changes your relationship forever. If you have a history of relational trauma or betrayal, it can feel even more impactful. When a partner cheats, it doesn’t have to ruin a marriage, though it can certainly be a turning point. How a couple navigates through it depends on many factors, such as the nature of the betrayal, the level of trust, the history of the relationship, and, most importantly, the willingness of both partners to heal and rebuild. Now the real work begins after an intimate betrayal disrupts a relationship. Couple therapy will not succeed in healing the trauma if both partners are not fully committed.
Some couples can work through betrayal by having open, honest conversations, seeking counseling, and rebuilding trust over time. It can be a long and painful process, but it’s not impossible. Others, however, might find the betrayal too much to overcome, or they are unwilling to remain in the relationship. A skilled and experienced relationship counselor can help you identify the root causes of the affair and uncover deeper issues within the relationship and the partner who strayed.
Can my marriage ever be whole again? Will we ever move beyond this? Can I forgive? Can I ever trust my spouse again? Can we truly experience full healing after betrayal trauma? Can I hold hope that are relationship can be even more fulfilling?
These questions are heavy on the soul. When someone you love betrays you, it can have profound emotional, psychological, and even physical effects.
Has Your Life Been Hijacked By A Narcissist?
If so, you are likely to have your share of questions about how to identify, manage, escape from, and avoid future entanglements with narcissistic people. As a psychotherapist from New York City, I work with couples and individuals who present with many symptoms of narcissistic abuse or describe patterns of emotional abuse in their primary relationships. It’s not just men, women can also have narcissistic traits or NPD. Oftentimes, a member of a couple will complain that their partner is a narcissist when actually, they also have these traits. It can make the work of therapy challenging. For anyone involved with a narcissist, it's heartbreaking to realize that years, and even decades, have been spent under the rule of a tyrannical parent or partner. Parents, bosses, and partners with narcissistic personality disorder or strong traits have the potential to powerfully and negatively impact your physical and emotional health and wellbeing.
You may be traumatized, numb, and shut down from years of experiences with family members. You may also find yourself repeating this pattern in your current relationships by seeking out narcissistic partners. And so the neurotic dance of repetition compulsion begins. You're now wondering why you are questioning if you are the "crazy and confused" one in your relationship. Reality test: narcissists and psychopaths exhibit crazy-making behaviors. Narcissists project a lot—they come fully loaded with accusations and criticisms. What's crazy-making is that most of what the narcissist claims YOU are doing is exactly what THEY are doing. A seasoned therapist can support your personal growth and help you develop high-level skills for dealing with the narcissist in your life.
No, EMDR Doesn’t Work For Everyone, And Here’s Why
EMDR Therapy, also known as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, is a popular form of healing, powerful healing. As people become more comfortable talking about their mental health concerns, we see more people discussing EMDR, especially celebrities. What is EMDR? When something terrible happens to us, it is stored in our brain and nervous system in a different way than our everyday experiences. Memories and sensations show up when we are least expecting it, just like that, your day has been hijacked. EMDR therapy helps to make the memory less disturbing.
Research reveals that EMDR is a powerful therapeutic approach for resolving symptoms of PTSD and for processing trauma and negative experiences. EMDR has been extensively researched and is recognized as effective by organizations such as the American Psychiatric Association and the World Health Organization for treating PTSD. Many individuals experience significant symptom reduction and improvement in their overall well-being after undergoing EMDR therapy.
Helping Dynamic Women Heal In Therapy
You are a dynamic, self-reliant woman who seeks therapy to help you find a more rewarding work-life balance, whatever form that may take. Changing entrenched behaviors, thoughts and relationship patterns is possible with the right help. You need a therapist who is able to relate to your unique needs and desires. You are keenly aware that your self-doubt, anxiety, and perfectionism create unnecessary standards.
You struggle most days with not feeling like you are “enough.” Your inner critic distorts your view of yourself, and this impacts your ability to see yourself in a realistic. Your relationships may also be struggling especially when your “people-pleasing” tendencies interfere, and this is not how you want to be in relation to others. It’s frustrating because you know that you have what it takes to succeed in all the areas of your life, but these daunting dynamics keep you from living to your fullest potential. Whatever has shaped your current reality, living authentically is challenging when fear, anxiety, and self-doubt impact your daily decisions.
The Unique Challenges Of High-Functioning Couples In Couple Counseling
Marriage and couple therapy enjoys a high success rate for couples who want to improve their relationships, and New York City has some of the most intelligent, talented and high-performing people in the world. They also bring to relationship counseling unique challenges and struggles. Successful individuals tend to be independent, highly-focused and self-sufficient. These individuals are accustomed to handling their problems on their own and require a high degree of autonomy. They are also not immune to struggling with anxiety, depression and relationship problems. Sometimes their lives look ideal from the outside, and yet they struggle greatly. You may be tempted to idealize the successful couples that you know, imagining that they have it all figured out. I can tell you that as an experienced New York City couple therapist, the high-functioning couples that I encounter have their own unique challenges that bring them to couple counseling. Mostly, these couples grapple with navigating conflicts, balancing individual with couple needs, communication issues and maintaining intimacy. Of course there are other challenges that successful high-functioning couples face, so let’s have a closer look.
How Somatic Therapy & Parts Work Can Address Addictive States
Individuals struggling with addiction have many holistic and evidence-based therapies to help them heal the root cause of their addictions. Some valuable treatment options to address addictive states includes: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Motivational Interviewing (MI), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), as just a few examples. There are other modalities that can be equally as effective with addiction. Therapists trained in Internal Family Systems (IFS), sometimes known as parts work, can attest to the importance of offering this valuable approach in the treatment of addiction.
Parts Work Therapy, also known as Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, is a therapeutic approach that helps individuals explore and understand their inner thoughts, feelings, and behaviors by viewing the mind as a collection of different "parts." These parts represent different aspects of a person's personality and can be in conflict with each other.
Healing Addiction With Counseling
Struggling with addiction or substance abuse/misuse is a common reason people reach out for therapy. Addiction is a disease that affects a person's brain and behavior and typically leads to an inability to control the use of a substance or behavior which always has consequences. When you are addicted, you may continue using the drug, device or behavior despite the harm it causes to your work, relationships and emotional and physical health.
What is addiction and substance abuse? Substance abuse disorder is a complex brain disease that causes you to compulsively seek out and use alcohol, drugs and addictive behaviors despite dangerous and harmful consequences. Substance abuse disorder and addiction causes distorted thoughts, behaviors, and body function. There is a genetic component
Substance abuse and addiction causes symptoms and behaviors including:
Feeling a need or urge to use the substance or engage in the behavior regularly
Needing more and more of the substance or behavior to feel the effects
Time spent ensuring that you have a steady supply of the substance or spending money you don’t have on the substance or behavior
Failing to meet your personal and professional obligations and responsibilities
Experiencing withdrawal symptoms
You feel a worsening of your cognition, with impaired decision-making and memory
You may do things you would not normally do or later regret acquiring the substance
Tame Your Harsh Inner Critic With Curiosity, Compassion, IFS & EMDR Therapy
Do You Have A Harsh Inner Critic That Sabotages Your Life? You don’t have to be a trauma survivor to have a harsh inner critic. The self-critical inner voice is persistent and continues to negatively judge and even sabotage dreams and aspirations. In fact, mental health challenges such as depression and anxiety can be rooted in this unhealthy self-dynamic. As anyone tormented by an unkind inner-critic knows, The near-constant flood of negative feelings and emotions linked to the inner critic can also be a great source of stress and self-sabotage.
The truth is, we all have different “parts” that make up our personality, and in ego psychology, we call these sub-personalities. These parts are part of an internal system, kind of like a family that lives within. Sounds extreme, and yet we are not talking about having multiple personalities in the same way someone with a diagnosis of a personality disorder or DID exhibits unintegrated parts (although that is considered the extreme presentation of the same continuum). Have you ever caught yourself saying, “well, part of me wants to do it, and another part says no.” How common is this? A part of you that seeks adventure leans in to the prospect, while a more cautious, protector part steps on the brake.
Heal Trauma And Reclaim Your Life
Traumatic experiences change the brain. Some changes are meant to protect from future negative experiences. Just as trauma changes the brain, it is possible to heal the brain. Trauma symptoms that live in the nervous system do not have to hold you in its grip forever. As you continue to think, talk, re-tell and act on your experience(s), you reinforce your attachment to what happened, as well as your brain’s wiring and connection, and this serves to maintain your symptoms as you loop on the upsetting memory and trauma responses. As a New York City based Psychotherapist, I work with individuals who have experienced trauma and would like to heal and improve their lives.
The brain and body is designed to heal. We now know that the brain has an amazing capacity to heal by creating new neural pathways. This process is called neuroplasticity. When people are finally able to regain control over their thoughts, behaviors, responses and lives, the brain's limbic system,
Getting “Unstuck” With EMDR Therapy
As a psychotherapist and coach in Manhattan, I treat clients struggling with a range of concerns, from stress and life challenges to recovery from addictions and trauma. Many have suffered developmental trauma(s) or single incident trauma and now have symptoms of PTSD negatively impacting many aspects of their lives, including personal relationships and work.
In order to understand EMDR, one needs to be clear about how trauma can affect the brain. When an individual experiences a traumatic event or multiple traumas they may develop what is known as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD as a response to the overwhelming event(s). When this occurs, the brain fails to successfully process the trauma leaving it "stuck" or "frozen" in the central nervous system. This often leads to numbness, dissociation, severe anxiety, depression, insomnia, addictions, physical complaints and an inability to experience "safety." In everyday life, in the here and now, the body fails to recognize that the person is now safe and it reacts as though the danger is current and in present time, leaving the individual in a state of emotional and physical arousal.
EMDR therapy as a treatment, is unique because it facilitates the processing of trauma information that has become "stuck" in the nervous system. The various elements of EMDR therapy serves to rewire the brain, calm the nervous system and lessen anxiety and symptoms. It "uploads" a more corrective experience, moving the client from pain and danger to "I survived," "It wasn't my fault" or "I did all that I could" as examples.
About Holistic Psychotherapy
Holistic Psychotherapy is beneficial for people of all ages, and it’s never too late to begin developing healthier lifestyle habits. No matter your age, mental health issues can interfere with your wellbeing throughout your lifespan. Individuals and couples enter therapy with a unique set of challenges and goals. As a holistic psychotherapist with a private practice in NYC, I specialize in helping older adolescents, adults and couples who experience struggle in their day to day lives. My focus is to help you uncover the root cause of your struggle in psychotherapy, as holistic psychotherapists believe that this is the best path forward to support your mental health recovery. Let me explain the many ways therapy can help make your life better.
Psychotherapy offers the opportunity for an individual to better understand and change patterns of behavior, feelings, and relationships that are getting in the way of your functioning. Psychotherapy offers the opportunity for an individual to understand and change patterns of behavior, feelings, and relationships that are getting in the way of higher-functioning. Good therapy can enable you to have richer, fuller and more meaningful life experiences.
What Does Holistic Psychotherapy Do?
Virtual EMDR Therapy: A Modern Option For Lasting Healing
If traditional talk therapy has left you feeling discouraged with your healing progress, EMDR might be the solution that finally leads to symptom reduction. Many psychotherapists who are skilled with EMDR therapy are successfully working with their patients online using virtual EMDR. Many of us discovered that we could begin or continue EMDR Therapy virtually during the pandemic.
As a specialist in trauma therapy and an advanced level II EMDR practitioner in New York City, I have been helping patients heal and address challenges through online EMDR therapy. Many feel better after just a handful of sessions and will say “why didn’t my therapist tell me about this sooner?” Not everyone is trained in EMDR, but those who practice this modality know just how effective EMDR therapy is. EMDR is most commonly known to resolve PTSD and trauma. It’s also very effective for getting to the root cause of anxiety, depression, chronic sadness, addictions, compulsions, eating disorders, fears, phobias, grief, performance enhancement, and so much more.
EMDR therapy uses a process called Bilateral Stimulation to facilitate healing. Virtual EMDR therapists help patients process trauma using self-administered BLS by tapping on the knees, butterfly hug tapping or online software that stimulates rapid eye movement such as remotEMDR. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) focuses on reducing the impact that episodic distress, anxiety, fear, depression, phobias, triggers, negative emotions and traumatic memories have on your life.
The Healing Power Of Relational Psychotherapy
We are all born with unique attributes and qualities. If we are fortunate enough to have optimal circumstances and nurturance along the way, we develop into secure adults. Adults with secure attachment and relational capacity are able to have meaningful experiences and relationships. They feel safe in the world and with others. Secure individuals are free to thrive.
As it turns out, most of us have had more adversity than is helpful. While some adversity makes us strong (we develop skill and resilience), too much adversity threatens to overwhelm us. It interferes with growth, because we are unable to feel safe, explore the world and develop adaptive coping strategies. Reduced capacity to cope naturally leads to anxiety, depression, addictions, compulsions, eating disorders and other troubling symptoms. When symptoms and poor coping takes over, our ability to establish healthy relationships, maintain those relationships and function well in the world is diminished. Sometimes we are fortunate enough to make an important connection to begin the healing process. The therapeutic relationship is one way to begin to heal.
Mental health seems to be experiencing a time of less stigma and greater awareness. People seem to feel safe sharing their mental health struggles on social media. The pandemic certainly led to an increase in loneliness, isolation, anxiety and terror, which led many to seek therapy and counseling, sometimes for the first time. This exploration to find a therapist also led to a great deal of confusion. With so many potential therapists and different therapeutic orientations, the big question becomes, “what’s the right type of therapy for me?”
Many want a quick fix as they enter therapy. Of course, short-term models that offer skill building and concrete interventions have their place. The problem with this strategy is that it rarely moves the needle when it comes to true healing.
Amino Acid Therapy To Heal Your Brain & Improve Your Anxiety, Depression, ADHD & More.
Some common reasons people reach out for therapy and counseling is to address their new or longstanding mental health challenges. Symptoms such as anxiety, depression, addiction, insomnia and lack of motivation are often so debilitating that they are unable to live the life they desire. In my experience, psychiatric medications are essential for many, and truly life saving. But for those who have not had success with traditional psychiatry, it’s worth considering the highly-effective natural solutions that are rarely offered in conventional medicine.
Many mental health symptoms are all indications that levels of neurotransmitters such as serotonin, GABA, and the catecholamines dopamine and norepinephrine (there are more) are low. This is otherwise known as neurotransmitter dysfunction or imbalance. There are four main neurotransmitters involved with mood and behavior, and they are: serotonin, GABA, endorphins and the catecholamines (dopamine/Norepinephrine). The main focus with Amino Acid Therapy in clinical practice is on the serotonin-catecholamine system. Low levels of each of these, lead to a very specific pattern of mental health symptoms. It’s important to know that there are many reasons why brains become depleted and imbalanced, such as, trauma, chronic stress, chronic pain, loss, poor nutrition, addiction, hormonal changes and genetic predisposition, and thankfully, there are effective and powerful ways to restore brain health.
Our bodies need amino acids to work properly, and they are crucial to metabolic function. Some amino acids are made by the body, and others come from your diet. Typically, when you consume a protein, your body breaks it down and what's left is the amino acid. Amino acids are precursors to neurotransmitters, and when these vital messengers are deficient or imbalanced, information is not relayed optimally in the brain, and symptoms arise. Amino acid therapy aims to heal and restore the brain to optimal functioning by supplementing what’s missing based on history, symptoms, behaviors and response to trial treatment.
Therapy And Support For Deeply-Feeling People
For as long as you can remember, others have labeled you as “too shy” or “too sensitive.” It sure doesn’t feel good to hear this, but it does describe your reality on the daily. Thinking about it, you’ve always felt alone, or very different. You may be more reactive than most to the moods of others, criticism can feel especially hostile, external stimuli and energy drains you. These are just a few examples of what it’s like as a Highly-Sensitive Person (HSP), also known as deep-feelers, neurodivergent individuals and Sensory-Processing Sensitivity (SPS). Navigating a noisy, demanding world as a highly-sensitive person can be disabling for many especially as you attempt to accommodate and manage the accompanying anxiety and depression. But remember, sensitive folks have great gifts. They tend to experience high levels of perceptivity and intuition, empathy and super-attunement, and even high levels of creativity. Sometimes, your exquisite sensitivity feels like a gift; it can also feel like a curse. Please know that you are not alone and you do not need to suffer in silence.
Imagery For Mind-Body-Spirit Health
Guided Meditation is a resource for relaxation and a type of focused meditation to help create calm and ease in the mind and body. With this technique for relaxation, you concentrate on an image, place, object, sound, or experience that feels soothing or grounding, offering refuge from your daily stressors, settling your nervous system. The goal is to promote a calm state in the mind and body through relaxation and mindfulness. Your nervous system should begin to follow your thoughts and reset. You may have noticed that if you think about stressful events, you experience tension in your body, your mind may race and heart rate and blood pressure follow. If you train yourself to take moments in your day to focus your awareness on something pleasant, your mind and body will relax. You may notice less tension in your body and a sense of ease. Having a practice such as guided imagery can help you better handle your daily stressors and develop a sense of vitality and resilience.
Coping With Relationship Heartbreak
Breakups are painful. The reasons for the relationship split seem to matter less than the fact that your world has changed and all kinds of uncomfortable feelings and emotions are being triggered. You can learn from this experience and come through it wiser and stronger, and hopefully, with a heart open enough to receive love and hope for the future. As a NYC psychotherapist in private practice, struggling after a break up is a common reason people seek counseling and therapy.
Even though the relationship no longer works, why do breakups hurt so much? When marriages or relationships end, it is not just about grieving the loss of the connection, but the end of shared hopes and dreams. Hope is an important aspect of early romantic relationships. Couples mourn the hope for the future as well as the commitment of shared goals and dreams.
Other important losses include one's identity, physical and sexual intimacy, shared hobbies and interests, relationships with friends and extended family, a physical move or the sale of a home, financial stability, individual and shared responsibilities, and if children are involved, a significant disruption in their lives.
Starting over can be scary. It is normal to wonder if you will ever find love or another partner again as well as other future uncertainties. Many feel that staying with what they know, even if it's an unhappy partnership, is better than being alone. It's important to remind yourself, that it is possible to move on to find happiness either alone or with someone else. Healing takes time and recovery requires patience and treating yourself with kindness and compassion.
Nurse, Heal Thyself
(by Kim Seelbrede, originally posted on urbanzen.org)
As snowflakes shimmered against the backdrop of the mountains, student nurses from around the country gathered to participate in the 59th annual National Student Nurses Association (NSNA) convention held in Salt Lake City. Urban Zen Integrative Therapy (UZIT) sessions were offered to the student nurses in The Sanctuary, which was generously provided by Johnson & Johnson. This sublime healing space allowed many nurses to experience, for the first time, the exquisite healing modalities offered by the Urban Zen Integrative Therapists. Introducing nurses to the concept of self-care was our mission; powerful, moving and comforting were but a few of the words participants used to describe their restorative sessions.
Maintaining calm in the chaos was no easy feat as hundreds of nurses waited patiently for their sessions. Once inside the soothing environment, students were given permission to “let go and receive” the self-care techniques
Reclaim Your Identity By Healing Your Trauma
We continue to learn about the impact of trauma, and what we do know is that trauma changes the brain. We also know that the brain has tremendous capacity to heal and re-wire. As you continue to think, talk, re-tell and act on your experience(s), you reinforce your attachment to what happened, which exacerbates your symptoms and you loop on the upsetting memory and trauma responses. The goal of successful trauma healing is to free your nervous system from the patterns of trauma symptoms and regain freedom so you can move forward with your life and dreams.
The body is designed to heal. We now know that the brain has an amazing capacity to heal by creating new neural pathways. This process is called neuroplasticity. When people are finally able to regain control over their thoughts, behaviors, responses and lives, the brain's limbic system, parasympathetic and vagus nerve system can normalize.